Way My Heart Breaks And Spills

oh well it had been a tumultous month so far and the worst is yet to come. there's chinese As on monday (yes, i know. higher chinese peeps at o's do not have to take it. zz) and there's this cute assesment in our project work called Oral Presentation on next friday. We also have to hand in our very nice I&Rs on monday. this means that there will not be sleep on monday night. lol.
oh well. the previous post was sth i wrote during physics promos. I was so stoned that my brain came up with that weird little story, and i felt compelled to pen it down. Dont worry im not suicidal lol.

speaking of promos..
it went pretty well, but i was kinda disappointed with my chemistry. Didnt really study much as i thought organic was simple. Turns out it was the most tricky paper for organic chem ive ever done. coupled with missing out on some really simple marks (such as writing RDS grr) i got an overall B for chemistry. which had a grade of 69. which really sucks because the A grade in SAJC is 70. which means that i may not be able to get that ntu h3 for organic synthesis. but whatever. i cant change a thing now.

overall i got ABBCDD. I MANAGED TO PASS PHYSICS AND ECONS WTH. its like amazing ya? considering i only studied like 3days for econs.

basketball training is getting tougher and i need to perform better so that i may get a chance to warm the bench next year. that's my target for now. ill review that target at the end of the training tour in malaysia.


ive become really detached fromwhatever im doing nowadays. and im feeling really, really somedays. pensive thoughts all day long. i really want to do something that will spark my interest in stuff again.
did that make sense? i have no idea.

haha. i think i shall end here now.

Red on Beige; Blood on skin.

The artist sat in the middle of the room, staring at his newest painting. Bright red, it was changing shape before his very eyes. As the red slowly trickeled down the canvas onto the dusty, blackened floor, he contemplated his life thus far.
All he had in life was pressure from his parents, teachers and peers. He never truly got a chance to be who he wanted, until the time he finally ran away from home. Even then it still took someone else to mould him into the person that he was today. But now she was gone, forever, because failure after failure left him disillusioned with life, and he did not want her to suffer with him anymore. So he ran away again.
As he reminicised, the blood trickling from his arm slowly came to a stop, surprising him. He thought he had cut himself deep enough this time. "No matter," he thought and he stood up for the first time in hours.
He walked to his window. There the panoramic view took his breath away. For a moment he reconsidered his decision, because if such beauty existed in the world, then he could definitely do something beautiful with his life too. But the novelty soon wore off, like the many things that entered and exited his life.
Looking at the cityscape, he took a deep breath, then smiled. His emancipation was finally here.
Then he took his life.