Monday, July 28, 2008

End Transmission The Satellites Are Down; I Need An Earthquake To Shake This Pity Off The Ground

meh. all results are back, and they're so fucking unfantastic. what a time to get into a slump.
B for chem, C for maths, and Ds for everything else. so fucking great.
i guess i wasted an entire month studying.
because, fuck, i could get such grades studying, oh lets say, 2 weeks.

went for this applying for uk universities thingy, and i think i really wanna leave the country for my further education. because i think there's no way i can be the best of the best, an elite, without leaving the country. because even if you stay and you excel, people would say, oh but you still dont have the exposure. singapore's employers still mostly have the notion that hey, singapore universities are lousy shit compared to overseas universities, such as those in oh-so-great America. yeah sure, and what, SMU isnt doing the same thing as an American university? i have to leave, because staying for tertiary education in Singapore means you're gonna live your life disciminated against, rather than discriminated for, and id take the latter anyday of the week, twice on sundays thankyouverymuch.
and im not so fucking great to say hey, if its like that now, then lets change the fucking system.
because politics in singapore is a fucking dead issue, and i dont wanna say anymore lest i be taken in by the ISA or something.

and i guess, a part of me just wants to leave this life behind.
get a fresh start overseas where no one knows me, where no one would judge me. thats another reason why i dont wanna go to America, because hey, you'd live your life discriminated against, because lets face it, even though they say they're tolerant and all that crap, there's this cynicism deeply embedded in their culture, just like Singapore, where true racial harmony doesnt really exist. yes on the surface it looks fantastic. prominent people from other countries such as Israel have commented on how nice it is to see racial harmony in Singapore. i say, its a fucking lie. puh-lease, you just have to look at my class to understand. Then when you have those nasty little prank calls such as the chinese man screwing around with a foreign worker, and also the one where 2 chinese guys ask for pork at a muslim-indian stall, you'd agree with me. Crass insensitivity still reigns in Singapore, but then no one says a fucking thing. why? because its not their god-damned business.


oh world, im becoming a fucking cynic all over again. gah.

2 Comments:

Blogger `h0neystars said...

haha it's good to have aims =)
aww if you go overseas to study, there goes my future free rides already right. haha.

use kinder language next time, makes it more pleasant to read !
hoped you enjoyed your birthday.

10:21 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well written article.

7:04 pm  

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